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  Now I remembered where I knew her from.

  Two months into my freshman year, Fiona climbed to the top of the bell tower late one night and jumped to her death. The school tried their best to cover it up, by sending out their standard public relations email and hosting a candlelight vigil. Looking at the date the article was published along with her signed NDA form, it was two weeks later that she killed herself.

  The connection was obvious, how did no one put this together before I did?

  A few minutes later, Levi and Kay walked back in, and she had the biggest smirk on her face. When she saw my expression, she instantly furrowed her eyebrows. “Why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?”

  “I think I did,” I answered, showing her my discovery on my screen. “Leo just sent me the craziest shit I’ve ever seen. There’s a lot more people at NAU that went through similar things like me and a girl even killed herself. The times line up.”

  “Are you serious?” Levi said, looking at the phone. “All sport teams too?”

  “Some are, some are the sons of the people who work for the school,” I said, scanning the list and seeing familiar last names on the list. There were at least twenty names on the list, and I couldn’t imagine how many board meetings these girls sat through just like me. It was probably routine to President Townsend.

  “They can’t get away with this,” Kayla said, balling her fists up in anger. “We need to do something.”

  “Like what?” I huffed, exasperated. “North Atlantic has too much money and too much power for me to even make a dent in anything. Why do you think they got away with it so many times?”

  “I didn’t say it would be easy,” she told me, shrugging her shoulders. “You're going to have to get your revenge the hardest way for a black women in America.”

  “Oh shit,” I said, before putting my head in my hands. “Don't tell me we're going by the law.”

  “Yup.” She adjusted her glasses on the bridge of her nose. “We're going to sue the shit out of North Atlantic University and teach them that you can't silence us anymore with non-disclosure agreements and fake pregnancies. We’re coming right for them.”

  twenty five: call

  Zeus

  It's been about five days, and Cash still hasn't responded to my text. I didn’t expect her to after everything, but hope was still in my heart that she would.

  I was already back home, and I texted Levi to see if Cash was okay and if he was going to come back anytime soon. He replied:

  levi: cashmere is fine. I’m spending the break in New York to help her figure some shit out.

  zeus: what does that mean

  That was two days ago, and I still didn’t hear back. It felt like no one was trying to see that I was ready to accept the consequences of my rash behavior.

  “Zeus, jaan?” My mother called me from the kitchen and I sighed before getting up from the couch and making my way to her.

  “Yeah, mum?” I said with a yawn, letting the aromas of her cooking filling my nose. My little sisters were laughing in the dining room, most likely playing around while setting the table before we were supposed to have our dinner.

  It was Christmas Eve, and we were only eating today because my dad wasn’t going to be here tomorrow night. He had to fly out to do some stupid shit for his job; as if someone else couldn’t do it.

  I’m not gonna complain like some little pussy about my father never being home. In fact, I love it when he’s not here. He’s the one who kept encouraging me into a relationship with Jasmine, while Mom just wanted me to find a nice girl.

  “Come and see how this tastes,” She instructed, holding the spoon out. It was surprising that she asked me to do this because she hasn’t since I was a kid, but I smiled and brought the utensil to my lips.

  “This is good,” I complimented, hugging her before walking to the fridge to look for something else to eat before dinner.

  “It must not be since you’ve taken in upon yourself to look for something else to eat,” she chided, slapping me on the wrist with the hot spoon. “And since you couldn’t tell me you were playing games during Thanksgiving weekend.”

  “Mum,” I whined, rubbing my hand before closing the fridge back again. “I’m hungry. I’m a growing man, I need food in me.”

  “You can wait like everyone else and go help your sisters,” she ordered, shoving me out the kitchen.

  I groaned before walking into the den and sinking into the couch. I didn’t really feel like getting up and doing anything except eating dinner.

  My phone buzzed, and I took a glance at it before doing a double take.

  1 notification from Cash

  I almost cracked my phone from how fast I typed in my password to check the message.

  cash: It’s ok. I’m fine. I’m trying hard to be mad at you, and trust me, I am. but it’s okay

  My eyes widened, and my hands flew across the keyboard.

  zeus: no it’s not. please just talk to me

  As soon as I sent the text, I called her. It rang for thirty five seconds before I almost lost hope.

  “Hello?” Oh fuck.

  I cleared my throat before responding. “Hey.”

  “What happened? Are you good?” Her voice was raspy, and I couldn’t help but wonder if she was sick or if she was asleep.

  “Yeah, I’m fine. Are you okay?” I couldn’t help but nervously play with my fingers.

  “You texted me this, and I already answered it,” she responded, and I could hear her sigh into the receiver.

  “Yeah, I know but I just wanted to hear your voice,” I quickly said, getting up and slowly starting to walk back and forth.

  There was yelling in the background, and a crash before she said: “Zeus, I have to go.”

  “No, wait. I just want you to know that I’m not giving up on us, no matter how far you go to school from me, no matter what we’ve been through in this short while, I’m not giving up.”

  It was silent for a minute, and all I wanted to hear was her response.

  “Zeus…” her voice trailed off, but her saying something was all I needed to keep speaking.

  “You are worth fighting for, Cashmere Rawlings. And I will fight until the last round for you, okay?” I heard a small gasp and I glanced at the doorway to see Amana, my sister staring at me, wide eyed.

  “Zeus, this is too much,” she replied, and I could basically hear the gears turning in her head. “There’s too much to deal with on your part. You just need to focus on football—”

  I cut her off, not wanting to hear the statement everyone has been telling me for my entire life. “I can’t focus on football when you’re the only thing on my mind.”

  “Please, Zeus, I…” She sniffled and instantly I knew she was crying.

  “No, I didn’t say any of this to make you cry,” I stammered out, not wanting to hear her soft sobs. “Please don’t cry, baby. I’m sorry. I’m gonna make everything up to you, okay? Don’t worry.”

  I hung up, because I was sure that if my heart raced any faster, it would beat an Olympic record. I still couldn’t believe she picked up in the first place.

  “God, you are so in love it’s actually gross,” Amana commented, rolling her eyes and sitting down next to me on the couch.

  “I’m not in love,” I replied, rolling my eyes.

  She scoffed. “Oh yeah? ‘Baby, don’t cry. I’m gonna make it up to you.’ You’re so whipped for that stupid bitch it’s disgusting.”

  I tensed before narrowing my eyes at my sister. “Don’t talk about Cashmere like that. You’ve never even met her, and you’re passing judgement without any type of basis.”

  Her eyebrows raised. “Who’s Cashmere? I thought that was Jasmine.”

  Oh, that makes sense. None of my sisters liked Jasmine, and they made that pretty clear whenever she came over for dinner. Jasmine would always complain about how much they hated her, and always told me to get them to like her. Safe to say that never worked.

&n
bsp; “Cash is– well, was my girlfriend,” I said, shaking my head. “Jasmine is part of the reason we’re not together anymore.”

  “Tell me everything,” she ordered, holding her head between her hands.

  I told her everything, starting with Cash’s story and ending with Diego, Jasmine and Justice. When I was done, she shook her head and scoffed.

  “Jesus, if I knew Diego was such a tool, I wouldn’t have slept with him,” she said, rolling her eyes.

  “You WHAT?!” I yelled, shooting up from the couch. “What the fuck, Amana?”

  Diego had sex with my baby sister?! I thought about it hard. Since we went to the same high school, he most likely knew her from there. It seemed like Diego did a lot to infiltrate my life and piss me off as much as he could. What a bitch move.

  She shrugged her shoulders. “Relax, that was last year. I’m glad it was because he’s really trash. Jesus, Z. You have no type of character perception at all.”

  “When did you two have sex?” I questioned, ignoring her insult towards me.

  “Spring break in March,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “While you were partying it up in Cabo and lied Mum or Dad, Diego was back home. I went over to his house looking for you, and one thing led to another.”

  “I cannot wait to beat the shit out of him when I get back,” I said, my nostrils flaring. “My little fucking sister. I’m gonna kill him.”

  “I’m only a year younger than you,” she whined, shoving me over. “But enough about that cornball. How do you plan on getting her back?”

  “I have no idea,” I admitted. “But I know that whatever I do has to be big.”

  She grinned before standing up with me. “I have a few ideas, but this is going to be a long, strenuous process that will reap the sweetest fruit. Are you ready?”

  I nodded, but Muna, my older sister walked into the room before Amana could respond. “Mom says food is ready. And Zeus, Dad is here.”

  “Fuck me,” I muttered before looking to the ceiling. The last person I wanted to deal with was my father. And if I knew he was coming back home, I would’ve stayed at school. “Someone strike me down right now.”

  “Yeah, no,” Amana said, with a chuckle. “I like sitting at your games in the sky box for free. You can wait until you're concussed and have brain injuries for that to happen.”

  “Shut up, idiot,” I joked, nudging her shoulder. “Let's go eat in peace before the war begins.”

  twenty six: discuss

  three weeks later

  “So, this is a civil case you’re looking to file against North Atlantic?” the lawyer, Miles Becker raised his eyebrows at me as he looked through my case file.

  I was in the office of Holdings, Klein, and Chang in midtown Manhattan, and I was nervous about being here right now. The non-disclosure agreement was pretty clear, but I just had to get some sort of reparations for the distress the sport department put me through not once, but twice. I was over it. And now that I had Leo’s list along with me, I felt like my case had a lot more weight.

  The room wasn’t making me feel any more confident, though. The high ceilings made me feel like there was too much space in the room, and the fact that the room had no windows also didn’t help.

  “Yes,” I explained, crossing my legs in my jeans and thigh high boots. “I’m not sure how it could go in either case honestly. I was hoping you could break it down for me?”

  He sighed, running his hand through his blonde hair. “Well, for starters, my retainer fee would have to be paid because this trial could take place in Massachusetts. Most lawyers would’ve backed down knowing that info, but I have a feeling that this is a solid case.”

  I released a breath, nerves relaxing. The last four lawyers wouldn’t even see me, or they would talk about how great Mr. Townsend made NAU, and how they couldn’t believe he was part of a conspiracy.

  “What about this list?” I showed him the printed version of the email Leo sent me. “The president’s son sent me this, and I don’t know if it’ll help my case. It’s a list of other women NAU victimized.”

  “This would help immensely,” he said, inspecting the list from behind his glasses. “We can get written testimonies from the women and they wouldn’t even have to testify if your statement is strong enough. I’ll get started on this as soon as possible, Miss Rawlings.”

  “Thank you so much, Mr. Becker,” I said, standing up to shake his hand. “I appreciate you taking me on.”

  “Don’t thank me, thank your boyfriend,” he responded with a wink, shaking my hand then putting my documents back in the manila folder.

  My eyes widened. “Um, excuse me?”

  He glanced at me before saying, “I went to law school with Muna, and she called me for a favor. He’s agreed to pay all your legal fees.”

  What the fuck? How did he even know that I would come here? Levi was the one who suggested I—

  Fucking Levi!

  “Thank you,” I replied sweetly before grabbing my bag off the seat and opening the door.

  Levi and Kayla were sitting outside he office in the hallway, talking before they noticed me come out.

  “How did it go?” Kayla asked, standing up from her seat.

  “Why don’t you ask Levi how it went?” I retorted, cocking my head at him. “Since he likes to run his mouth to Zeus about my business.”

  After that phone call a couple weeks back, any mention of Zeus filled me with frustration and confusion. I didn’t know if I was happy he called, angry at him for waiting so long, or just plain sad.

  He sighed, running his hands through his hair. “Cashmere—”

  “You’re saying after everything I told you in confidence, you ran behind my back to tell Zeus?”

  “No—”

  “No?” I mocked his tone, chuckling with disbelief. “Then what is it?”

  “Maybe if you let me speak, you’ll understand,” he said, irritation clear in his voice. Why the hell was he upset? I wasn’t the one running to his ex to state his life issues.

  I gestured for him to speak, because I genuinely did want to know. And after all the bullshit that went down because of miscommunication, I should learn to open my ears a little more.

  “He texted me, begging me for an update about you,” he explained, his hands unsteady within his hair. “I just told him that you were trying to build a case against NAU and he gave me a number for a lawyer that he already paid for. That’s it.”

  I was silent for a few moments before I sighed. “Levi, I really didn’t want him involved in this. The more people involved, the more problematic everything gets.”

  What if down the line because he paid for this, his chances of being picked high up in the draft are significantly lowered? I didn’t want to ruin his dream and his future, even after everything that happened.

  “I know, but he worries about you,” he insisted, grasping my forearm. “Just let him do this one thing. Please.”

  I sighed before I nodded and sat down next to Kayla. “This whole thing is blowing me.”

  “I don’t really get why you can’t be with Zeus,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “He’s probably going into the draft to get to a team that you could easily to go school in that same area, you know.”

  I narrowed my eyes, irritated that she would even say something like that to me right now. “Why don’t you practice what you preach? Maybe you should do the same with Adonis and transfer to NAU. Maybe he’ll finally decide he likes you back instead of it being a one sided relationship.”

  The moment I said those words, I instantly regretted it. And by the hard look on Kayla’s face, I knew she was mad.

  “That was low,” she seethed, shaking her head. “I understand you’re going through some shit, but that’s no excuse to say fucked up shit and think it’ll slide.”

  “Kay—”

  “No,” she said, getting up. “I need a moment before you say something else to me.”

  She grabbed her coat and stepped
out leaving me with Levi and a heavy heart of regret.

  I don’t know why I was adamant about fucking everything up. Looking back on the mistakes I made, there were so many things that could’ve been avoided if I thought things through better or if I wasn’t so hasty or impulsive. Maybe things would be a lot better if I wasn’t here at all.

  “Cashmere,” Levi said, pulling me out of my thoughts. “Are you ready?”

  I nodded, even though I really wasn’t. “Yeah.”

  I was in Levi’s car, driving god knows where because I still couldn’t go back to my house, and Kayla’s was out of the question until she calmed down.

  “Cash, I’m wasting gas with all this driving,” Levi said, shaking his head. “Where can we go?”

  I ran a hand through my hair, shaking my head. “I really don’t know. We can just park, if you want until I figure something out.”

  He pulled over by an elementary school playground, and we got out of the car to walk over to the swings. When we sat down, he started to speak.

  “Do you love him or something?” I don’t even have to ask who he was talking about. It was already obvious.

  I swallowed hard, lowering my eyes past my beat up vans to the hard, black cushion under our feet. Did I really love Zeus after that short amount of time? I couldn’t possibly, but why do I feel otherwise?

  “I—Levi, it’s only been a few—”

  “Don’t talk to me about time. I don’t give a shit about that, and neither does love. There’s no reason to go this hard for someone you ‘just like a lot’. And if you’re going to force all of us to go through this bullshit, at least let me know if it’ll be worth spending my winter break going back and forth from campus to here.”

  I blinked, staring at his face. He was a little red, and it was clear that it took a lot for him to say those words. My lips suddenly felt dry, and I shakily let out a breath before I could feel tears well up in my eyes.