Blow Page 13

  Nessa walked into the kitchen and saw the bottle in my hand. “What happened? I thought you were gonna go easy on the liquor.”

  Isra sighed and looked at Nessa. “It’s Zeus, just leave it. Something just happened, but I got her—”

  “Girl, I wasn’t talking to you,” Nessa replied sharply, rolling her eyes at her before looking back to me. “What happened?”

  “Enjoy the party, babes,” I simply said before unscrewing the cap of the bottle. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  “You sure?” she questioned again. Then she looked at me once more before backing away to go back to her friends. “Make sure you text me tomorrow morning so we can talk.”

  I nodded, and her red hair glimmered in the light before she disappeared back into the dark living room. I hope I remembered to call her, but there was going to be a lot I wasn’t going to recollect.

  “Bring me another bottle, and maybe a blunt,” I said to Isra, filling a red cup with beer from a keg. “I don't even want to remember today.”

  There was a shrill noise in my head that woke me up, and I was kind of wishing I didn't because of the piercing pain in my head. I couldn't feel my scalp, and I was pretty sure that I was still in the same dress from yesterday.

  How did I even get here?

  I checked my bedside table for my phone but felt a slip of paper instead. I picked it up.

  I had to drag your drunk ass from the frat house all the way here with your friend Vanessa. Don't think this makes us friends though.

  -Levi

  I smiled slightly before I plugged my phone into the charger. When it finally showed signs of life, I scrolled through my messages.

  Dozens of texts from Nessa and Zeus flooded into my phone, and even though I wanted to forget so badly, I remembered why I got so drunk.

  Zeus got Jasmine pregnant.

  My head spun and I ran to the bathroom to throw up the contents of my stomach. The room felt like it was tilting on an axis, and nothing I did could stop it.

  “Fuck,” I groaned, clutching my pounding head. “I hate drinking.”

  When I could finally peel myself off the tiled floor, I crawled over to my phone to actually read the texts that were sent to me this morning.

  nessa: are you alright?

  nessa: text me back if you're ok

  nessa: ANSWER THE GODDAMN PHONE

  nessa: I hope that football guy didn’t try anything funny when I left

  I didn't even want to read the texts from Zeus, because I didn't even know what to say in response. The third week in October was the week before he said “I want to do better for you” but we've been going back and forth since September. Strangely enough, I saw two missed calls from my ex-boyfriend, Wesley.

  Why was he calling me? We were on friendly terms, but it felt random that he’d call me out of the blue like this.

  Sighing, I realized that I smelled like a bar. Once I took a shower, I'd be able to think clearly and figure everything out.

  When I was dressed and headed outside my building, my name was called, and it was Zeus. His mouth was set in a line, which made me raise my eyebrow. Wasn't I the one who’s supposed to be mad?

  “Can I help you?” I asked, glancing at him. I wasn't sure why he looked pressed.

  “I understand what I did was wrong, but did you really think this was the way to get back at me?” He said, shaking his head. “Jasmine showed me the video, and I couldn’t believe it.”

  “What?” I asked, confused. My head was still pounding to the beat of my heart, and I couldn't even differentiate between the two.

  “You talk about Jasmine being manipulative, but you basically did the same thing.” He laughed but there was nothing funny about it. “I should've listened to everyone who told me to stay away from you. That you were only going to fuck with my head. Guess what, you succeeded.”

  “Zeus, what the hell are you talking about?” I almost screamed out of frustration. He was dancing around with his words and my hangover wasn't helping a bit. I tried to reach out for his arm, but he snatched himself away.

  “Don't fucking touch me,” he spat, giving me the dirtiest look I've ever seen. My heart lurched and I stepped back, surprised at his words. “I don’t understand why you think after what we’ve been through that making a sex tape with the basketball team is the way to get back at me.”

  Oh my god. Oh my god, he knew. My bottom lip trembled, and shock set into my body. I couldn’t move.

  He saw the video. But… how?

  He turned and walked away but not before saying: “I'm glad I knocked up Jasmine, because it's better to fuck with the devil you know than the angel you don’t. It’s over, enjoy your life Cashmere.”

  I froze and watched him walk across the field, opting not to go after him. I've never been so stunned in my life.

  What the hell was going on? How did Zeus see the video that was supposedly kept under wraps by a legally binding non-disclosure agreement?

  I turned back into my dorm. Before I could open the door, an arm grabbed mine.

  “Cash.” I knew it was Wes before I had turn around. Right now wasn’t the time for him to mess with my head.

  I sighed before turning around to face him. He had his gym bag slung over his shoulder, and he had his team’s classic red and white sweat suit on. He looked like he was heading to practice. “What do you want?”

  “Some of my friends on the football team came up to me this morning, I’ve been calling you,” he said gravely, his lips set in a deep frown. He looked genuinely upset, and it was odd to see him like this. “The video from… last spring is going around the football team.”

  “Oh my god,” I murmured, before falling against the glass door to my building. My vision blurred, but no matter how much pain I was in, the events from that night wouldn’t leave my brain.

  twenty: flashback

  eight months ago

  Wesley was on the court, boxing out one of the other members of his team during practice. I hated watching him practice because of how cocky he was on the court. He was even worse during his games, which was funny because he was super nice.

  “This one's for you,” he said to me, shooting from half court and missing.

  I laughed hysterically as he groaned and walked up to my seat at the bottom of the bleachers. “So, you think it's funny?” He then poked my sides, which caused me to keep laughing.

  “I'm sorry, I'm sorry!” I managed to choke out between my gasps.

  He then smiled and lowered his lips to mine, and I kissed him back until I heard a gagging sound from behind us.

  “Get a fucking room,” Leo spat, barreling down the bleachers with his water bottle.

  “Get a life,” I replied, rolling my eyes. Leo always had something against me ever since I started going out with Wesley. He tried to ask me out a couple months ago, but I honestly didn't like him like that. It’s not like he was ugly or anything, we just didn’t vibe like that. Plus, two weeks later I met Wes, and everything took off from there.

  “I will once you stop sucking the soul out my friend.” He then rolled his eyes and dribbled the ball between his legs. “Bitch.”

  “Hey!” Wesley grabbed him by the back of his jersey. “Don't speak to her like that.”

  Leo shrugged him off. “You can't tell me shit.”

  Wesley chuckled, and placed his hands on his hips, which looked pretty hot from where I was standing. “Oh yeah? But didn't you vote me as captain? So now I'm telling you to do ten suicides.”

  His eyes widened as they lit up in rage. “Are you serious?”

  “As a funeral.”

  Leo glared at me before starting his punishment on the court. He looked so angry as he ran back and forth, and every now and then he would look up in my direction and cast me the nastiest glare.

  “I think I should go,” I murmured to Wes as I collected my stuff. I didn't want to be here and distract him from the team. God knows they needs the practice to actually win a game.
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  “Okay, I'll meet up with you at the party tonight,” he said, kissing my cheek. “We have to talk anyway.”

  We have to talk? I wondered as I exited the atrium. About what? Did I do something?

  I walked all the way to my dorm, confused as hell. I saw Isra on her bed, studying.

  “When a guy says he wants to talk, what does that mean?” I asked her as I set my bag down on the floor.

  She hummed before closing her book. “It could mean he just actually wants to talk. When we say it, it could mean that we want to break up or take a break.”

  I sighed before collapsing on my bed. “I hope it's neither of those.”

  “Probably isn't. You read into things too much.”

  Sitting up, I remember what I had to tell her. “Sis, there's a party for the basketball team tonight. You coming?”

  “I'll pop in, but I have to go off campus for a few. Honor student requirements,” she rolled her eyes. “We're already amazing students, why would we need forced community service to prove it?”

  “Have fun picking up trash!” I said with a laugh, which caused her to throw a pen at me. “By the way, what do you think of this dress?”

  I pulled out a black dress from a plastic bag under my bed. It was a black bodycon dress that was low cut but had a piece around the neck like a choker.

  “That looks so pretty!” She squealed, hopping up to inspect the dress. “Remind me to borrow this one day.”

  “Do you want anything to drink?” Justice offered me a cup of beer. I didn't see him pour it from the keg behind me, and mama ain't raise no fool.

  “Um, not right now,” I said, looking back into the crowd for Wes. He was with his friends, doing the most awkward dance I’ve seen in my life even though they were playing Drake. Poor boy.

  I took a cup from the table and filled it up with vodka, my favorite drink of choice.

  “I thought you didn't want anything?” Justice asked, his eyebrow raised.

  “I didn't want anything from you,” I specified, walking away into the crowd.

  I took a hefty sip, before making my way in front of Wesley. His eyes widened as I pressed myself into him.

  “What are you doing?” He asked, out of breath. I could feel this sweat through his thin white t-shirt but it didn't bother me.

  “Teaching you how to dance,” I answered, gyrating into him. “Just hold on to me.”

  We danced and all of his friends beside him started making noise. I didn't even have to look at Wesley to know his face was red.

  “Cash,” he said when the song was over and I turned to face him. “I need to talk to you.”

  “What happened?” I asked, taking a sip of my cup. I hope he wasn't trying to have a serious heart to heart in the middle of a party.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Serenity, one of my friends walk by and bite off half a pill before offering it to me. “Ecstasy.”

  We always did this at parties, one of us takes half a pill and offer it to the other person. It was how we ensured that one of us wasn't going to get too drugged up. We split it in half.

  “Cash.” His hands grasped my shoulders and walked us over to a corner. “Listen to me.”

  I nodded for him to continue, and he sighed. “I really didn't want to do this right now, but this isn't working for me anymore.”

  My eyebrows raised, and my heart felt like it stopped. “Are you for real right now?”

  He rubbed his hands over his face, a habit he did when he was frustrated. “I just feel like we'll be better off friends than in a relationship. Don't tell me you don't feel it too.”

  I wasn't going to tell him that he was partially right, but was now really the time? “You're breaking up with me…in the middle of a party?”

  Finding my composure was the only thing on my mind. I wanted to slap this boy in the face. Why would he choose now of all times to tell me this?

  He started to speak, but I held up a hand. “You know what? I'm gonna go get drunk off my ass and think about all this tomorrow.”

  “Cash, stop—” I interrupted him. I wasn't gonna let him break up with me and then try to seem worried about me.

  “Please.” I turned around and headed to the kitchen, where Justice was still standing. He looked at me, probably wondering why I was back so soon after a display like that.

  “I'll take you up on that drink you offered,” I said, forcing a smile on my face. “Just pour it straight from the keg.”

  He smirked at me before filling up a cup with beer. “All yours, baby girl.”

  I stumbled into a dark room, and I could feel my arms being held by two people.

  “What's going on?” I asked, but I could barely get the words out because I was laughing so hard. The room felt like I was spinning, and I couldn't see straight.

  Suddenly, a bright light blinded my vision and I could feel my retinas burst into flames. “I can't see anything.”

  “Relax, Cash.” Someone set me on the bed and I felt it dip besides me. My entire body was on fire. I heard a curse before my body was lifted up. “We're gonna have to edit it so she doesn't look half dead.”

  I tried to lay back down, but two sets of arms pulled me up.

  “Whoa there,” a voice said from beyond the light. “Can't have you falling asleep on us.”

  “I don't even think she'll remember this.” My body was positioned so I was sitting on my heels. I couldn't move and I felt frozen. “I saw her friend give her something. I think it was a Xan.”

  “I-I'm so confused,” I stammered out, my hands shaking. I could barely recognize my own voice. I sounded so lost. “I want to go back to the party.”

  “Don't worry Cash, you'll be back before you even know it.” I finally saw who it was behind the light, and I could barely make out the faces of Leo and Justice before I blacked out.

  “Are you sure you want to make these extreme allegations, Miss Rawlings?” The head of the disciplinary board looked at me over his glasses. “There's no one to corroborate your story.”

  “With all due respect, what other evidence do you need?” I tried to steady my voice so it wouldn't shake and show I was close to crying. “The video has all the proof.”

  My mother grabbed my hand to steady me, noticing I was visibly shaking. I smiled slightly to reassure her before dropping it back into a frown. I couldn't hold it anymore.

  The president of the university sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. “I can't believe this is actually happening right now. Are you sure it's Leo in the video? My son?”

  “His face appears in it multiple times, Mark,” another member of the board said. “And you're not technically allowed to be here, considering that this hearing involves your son.”

  I swallowed hard and twiddled my thumbs, not knowing what to say. I felt like this was some sort of intimidation technique, and it was working.

  Funnily enough, I wasn't scared when I beat the shit out of Leo this morning. I also wasn't scared when campus security had to take me away in handcuffs. But right now, looking at myself on a screen giving head to two people at once, was scary. I tried so hard to remember myself doing this but my mind kept drawing a blank. I couldn't recall what happened, but that video said otherwise.

  “Want to be famous, Rawlings?” Leo's voice carries its way through the room as the video played back. “You wanna get back at him for breaking your heart?”

  I saw myself nodding on screen, and I could feel a tear slide down the side of my face. I could see in my eyes that I was gone. My pupils were dilated and my forehead was sweaty. It was so clear that I wasn't in my right mind and I was taken advantage of, so why was this even a discussion?

  “She's always been such a slut, even since high school,” Justice said, laughing to himself. “I'm just finally glad that she gets to open that pretty little mouth for me.”

  “Open that mouth for me, babe,” Leo said, hooking his index finger in the corner of my mouth. My mouth curved into some sort of a smile before
the unbuckling of a belt was audible and they paused the video.

  “Cashmere,” my head snapped up at the sound of my voice, and I turned to President Townsend. “I can make you a deal.”

  “A deal?” I asked, my eyebrows furrowing. “Consisting of what?”

  He sighed before leaning onto the table. “We can sweep all this under the rug, in exchange for the footage being deleted and then being suspended for the rest of the season.”

  I glanced around the room to see if anyone was shocked at his words. One of the seven board members poured herself a glass of water from a pitcher. Several droplets spilled over the side, wetting her papers. Another member fiddled with his cufflinks, agitation clear in his posture. He probably didn't want to be here on a Saturday morning when the weather was getting nice again. The wrinkles on his face and the purple stain on the collar of his white dress shirt indicated that he most likely had kids, messy little kids.

  These people were so unbothered and indifferent, and it made me mad.

  “I was assaulted, and in order to protect your idiot son and that stupid fucking losing team, you want me to pretend like nothing happened?” I seethed, now less scared and more enraged. “How dare you?”

  I stood up, ready to pack up until Mr. Townsend said: “we'll give you a full ride for your next three years.”

  My mother drew in a sharp intake of breath, and I paused my actions.

  You can't be bought, I tried to remind myself. Don't let them do this.

  “And we'll give you glowing recommendations when you plan to apply for jobs or to grad school. All you have to do is sign a non-disclosure agreement, and this incident will never leave this room.”

  “Can my daughter have a day to think about it?” My mother said, holding my hand and gently pulling me back down into the seat. “She's been through enough already.”

  He nodded before standing up and buttoning his suit jacket. “I'll email you a copy of the documents in case you want to sign. Take all the time you need.”